at least 10 comments before next update would be nice.

pretty pretty please ?(;

don’t worry about what you heard about me, 
i might of done a little dirt 
and left a few of them hurt 
but whatever has occurred, 
they all got what they deserved.

yes i am a b.i.t.c.h,
a Beautiful Individual Who Corrects Hoes (;

she's got a smile on her face 
and a screw you attitude 
because from this day on, 
she's living for herself.

once you’re attached, you’re fucked.

you don't choose who you fall for. 
you just fall. 
and you get this person who is all wrong, 
but yet so right. 
you know that you like them so much, 
except sometimes they drive you insane 
and no one can explain.

people said i've changed so much. 
well heres the honest truth. 
i grew up. 
i stopped letting people push me around. 
i learned that you can't always be happy. 
i accepted reality.

i don't hate you. 
it's just my attitude 
has some major issues 
with your personality.

it's like a fucking drug deal. 
i'm sitting here waiting. 
i'm calling you back, 
and you won't call me back, 
and it's fucked up. 
but at the same time, 
it just made me want you even worse.

remember when i told you i was okay ? 
i lied.

what i want is to be needed. 
what i need is to be indispensable to somebody.
who i need is somebody
that will eat up all my free time, 
my ego, and my attention.
somebody addicted to me. 
a mutual addiction.

i want to be the girlfriend, 
not the friend, 
not the friend with benefits, 
not the second choice. 
i want to be the one who is loved, held, 
and who gets the phone calls at night 
and the cute surprises, 
the kisses on the forehead 
and the i miss you's. 
i want it all.

^lol @ perverted kid things.

dear haters, 
i couldn't help but notice that 
awesome ends with me
and ugly starts with u.

oh i offended you with my opinion ?
you should hear the ones i keep to myself.

every time i smile i think of you, 
it's like a habit, 
it's the only thing i can do. 
and every time i laugh i picture you. 
cause you're the one who makes me happy, 
and baby you know you do.

i remember everything about that night. 
the memories keep coming back to haunt me, 
they cut deeper then any knife.

he was the first guy i was nervous to call. 
he was the first guy i ever went out on a date with. 
the first guy i truley held hands with. 
the first guy i would stay on the phone with for hours.
he was my first true boyfriend, 
he was my first kiss, second and third. 
he was my first everything, 
and lets face it, he still is.

i know most people don't like me. 
i don't care, 
i don't like most people.

i love how the stupidest things 
can be the best memories ever.

hey girl, 
don't fret over his goodbye. 
because there's someone even better 
just around the corner, 
waiting to say hello.

she's the kind of girl
people look at and say
"i want to live my life like how she lives hers".

i hate when people lie to me about pointless shit. 
like if you don't want to talk to me, don't. 
if you don't want to hangout with me, say it. 
you're not hurting my feeling's at all by being honest, 
but you are pissing me off 
by lying and making excuses.

being friends with your ex 
shows that you two are mature enough 
to get over the fact 
that you weren't meant to be together.

it went from butterflies fluttering in my stomach
to bees stinging in my heart.

don't say that. 
don't say that it didn't mean anything. 
listen to me, 
if you've thought about her everyday 
or if you memorized her laugh, 
then at one point, 
she must've meant something to you.

^word.

don't sleep next to anything 
that you wouldn't want to wake up next to. 
raise your standards ladies.

that awkward moment 
when you trust someone 
and they decide to screw it up.

truth is, 
i get jealous easily 
because what's mine is mine. 
i'm stubborn as hell, 
i say sorry too much. 
i act like i don't give a fuck 
because i care too much. 
i over analyze the smallest of things 
and probably come off as a bitch 
to simply guard myself.

this is for you, my best friend, 
the one personi can tell my soul to. 
who can relate to me like no other, 
who i can laugh with to no extent, 
who i can cry to when times are tough, 
who can help me with the problems of my life.
never have you turned your back on me 
or told me i wasn't good enough or let me down.
i don't think you know what that means to me. 
you have gone through so much pain 
and you still have time for me 
and i love you for listening 
even when inside you're dying. 
and i look up to you 
because you're strong, and caring and beautiful, 
even though you don't think you are. 
and i hope you know 
that i'm always here to listen to you laugh and cry 
and help in all the ways that i can, 
and i will try to be at least half the friend 
you are to me. 
i hope you know 
i would not be the person i am today, 
without you, my best friend. 
thanks for being the friend 
who's always believed in me, 
who's always understood,
who's always accepted me, 
who's always cared.

i can't wait to walk around in our apartment 
in just underwear. 
i can't wait to sleep in all day if we want. 
we'll shower together every morning, 
make cute dinners, and watch movies. 
then, at the end of the day, 
we'll fall asleep in each other's arms, 
knowing we'll still be together when we wake up. 
it will be perfect.

she's the girl 
who's always laughing her butt off with her friends. 
you walk past her and you think, 
"wow she must really be over me."
but no, she's not over you, 
she wants you, but you never gave her a shot.  
she's not faking that smile. 
she's happy, 
but with you, she'd never stopped smiling.

i'm a lover, not a fighter.
unless you like it rough... (;

screaming and saying "fuck" a lot 
doesn't really get your point across. 
sometimes silence 
is the most violent option to choose.

he's hurt you, 
the worst that anyone ever has 
and for some crazy, unknown reason 
you still have feelings for him 
even though everyone thinks you're stupid for it, 
even though he lied, 
and even though he didn't care. 
and really you just want more than anything 
to go back to the way things were before 
because you were so happy, 
he made you happy, 
happier then you could remember being 
in a long long time. 
and then all the sudden 
the entire world came crashing down on you 
and now whenever you get upset 
it always goes back to that day, back to him. 
and you just want him to get the fact 
that you woulda given him the world 
if you could've because you loved him that much, 
but he'll never get that 
because for some reason 
all he wants to see is her.

 ^ohwoahdang ? lol

cheers to the people who improve your life, 
and a big fuck you to those who make it harder. 

and in case he tells you that it just 'happened,' 
please remember, 
cheating doesn't just 'happen.' 
it's not an accident as in, 
'oops, i just slipped 
and fell into a sexual relationship with someone else.' 
it was planned and executed with the full knowledge 
that it could end your relationship. 

a good relationship is not based 
on how much time you have known each other, 
but rather the moments that you spend together 
and you enjoy every second being with that person. 
and when that person leaves, 
your heart seems to break.

the problem is,
i mend the bridges that i probably should let burn, 
and the ones worth mending, 
i let go up in flames.

^lmao, i just noticed how true this is....

every time someone asks me about you, 
i sound like an 7 year old with a crush.

epic fact #218,
laughing for 15 seconds,
increases your life span by 2 days.

i swear to god, 
you'd think mirrors didn't exist to some people 
because of how hard they judge others.

reasons to have a guy bestfriend,
guys don't start rumors for no apparent reason.
they won't tell anyone your secrets.
they don't PMS and randomly act super rude.
they don't try to steal the guy you like.
they aren't two faced.
they stick up for you no matter what.
they'll give you their sweatshirt when your cold.
they'll carry you when you get hurt.
and they might even fall in love with you.
so don't call me a hoe for having guy friends,
i'm pretty sure that sounds better
than any backstabbing bitch that i know.

if water was vodka, 
and i were a duck, 
i'd swim to the bottom, 
and never come up. 
but water's not vodka, 
and i'm not a duck. 
so pass me a bottle, 
and shut the fuck up. 

he'll fake the way he holds you 
and you'll fall for every empty word he says. 

i talk a lot of shit 
and i swear i mean it all. 

i'd rather see you one day a year, 
then someone else 
seven days a week.

guys suck at drawing hearts, 
but they sure as hell know how to break them.

he is the reason 
i randomly laugh out loud in class, 
smile to myself when no one's looking, 
and sing along to every love song i hear.

and as she took off her dress in her room that night, 
she could finally breathe,
and with her breath came the tears. 
he never came 
and she waited outside half of the night.
smeared mascara and broken hearts. 
she has to stand on her own two feet, 
she has to forgive, but never forget. 
she needs to live for herself now, 
and not for him.

say what you mean, 
mean what you say, 
and stop pushing me away.

i walk around the school hallways 
and look at the people. 
i look at the teachers
and wonder why they’re here. 
if they like their jobs. or us. 
and i wonder how smart they were 
when they were fifteen. 
not in a mean way. in a curious way. 
it’s like looking at all the students 
and wondering who’s had their heart broken that day, 
and how they are able to cope 
with having three quizzes 
and a book report due on top of that. 
or wondering who did the heart breaking. 
and wondering why.

i'm done. 
done texting you first. 
done waiting for your call. 
done crying myself to sleep.

it's funny 
how i'm good at giving advice to others, 
but when it comes to helping myself, 
i never know what to do.

^tehe i love him.

dear girls with a broken heart, 
there are guys out there with glue guns.

there's no point 
in judging someone based on the past 
and their mistakes. 
that can't be changed. 
if you would take a second 
to notice that they learned from it all, 
and are making the best of what they've got, 
then you'd realize 
that you should probably stop talking.

^ohmen...

i don't need to check that message, 
i know what it says. 
"baby, i still love you" don't mean nothing 
when there's whiskey on your breath. 
that's the only love i get. 
so if you're calling 
i bet you're in a bar listening to a cheatin' song, 
glass of johnny walker red 
with no one to take you home. 
they're probably closing down saying, 
no more alcohol. 
i bet you're in bar, 
cause i'm always your last call.

here's to the kids 
who try their hardest 
to be good enough for everyone. 
who spend hours reading random love quotes 
to find the right one. 
who wait online for that one certain person 
to sign on just to say hello. 
who listen to the same song dozens of times 
because the lyrics mean a lot.
who deserve so much more than they get 
and are willing to fight for it 
and whose wish upon a shooting star 
was wasted on someone that will never care.

i am constantly torn between
killing myself,
and killing everyone around me.

dear cellphone companies, 
please invent an "unsend my text" option.

i wrote you a letter. 
i spilled it all, 
pen to paper, no regrets, 
but i never gave it to you 
because i realized that nothing i could ever say 
would bring you back to me, 
because you can’t make someone care 
when they don’t. 
you can’t force a feeling. 
you can’t make someone stay 
when all they want to do is leave.

i know he's not perfect, 
but he tries so hard for me.
and i thank God that he isn't, 
cause how boring would that be ?
it's the little imperfections,
its the sudden change in plans
when he misreads the directions, 
and we're lost but holding hands.
yeah i live for little moments 
like when he steals my heart again 
and doesn't even know it.
yeah i live for little moments like that.

^i do this all the fucking time.

"my name is whatever you prefer" 
you said, "my friends call me insecure".

to all girls who die for a "zero figure", 
sweetie remember real men go for curves, 
only dogs go for bones.

emotionally, i’m done.
mentally, i’m drained.
spiritually, i feel dead.
and yet physically, i still smile.

if you knowingly disrupt a relationship 
you deserve every fucking piece of shit
that gets flung your way.

^i love him

those who kill time 
are the ones who waste life. 
take every second for granted 
because you're never going 
to get another chance to go back in time 
and get that second, minute, hour, day, 
or maybe even year back. 
once it's passed, 
it's never going to come back.

i wear my heart on my sleeve, 
but i'm not naive. 
i know what it feels like to be completely broken 
and i'm all too familiar 
with what it feels like to hurt. 
i know what it's like to see something funny 
and not laugh. 
i've been taken advantage of and used. 
my feelings have been completely disregarded, 
but i still believe all people are good at heart, 
and my trust has not diminished. 
to be honest, 
i hope it never does.

sometimes there's nothing to say. 
sometimes silence expresses more than words. 
picking up the phone, dialing a number, 
it can do more damage than good. 
but humans are afflicted 
with this obsessive desire to talk things to death. 
so we make things worse 
by trying to make things better.

you swear you know me, 
cause you heard my name, 
but if you really met me, 
you know the game, 
drama never ends 
and haters are all the same. 
they smile to your face 
and spit on your name.

who you are is who you are. 
we're liars. we're thieves. we're addicts. 
we take our happiness for granted 
until we hurt ourselves or someone else. 
we hold grudges. 
and when faced with our mistakes, 
we reinvent the past. we reinvent ourselves. 
at least we try. 
we're prideful, and we're lustful, 
and we're incredibly flawed. 
and eventually, our flaws catch up to us.

don't lie to someone 
just to keep yourself away from trouble, 
because lying wouldn't help your future. 
telling the truth will make you a better person.

when a guy tells you you’re cute,
he’s looking at your attitude. 
when a guy tells you you’re pretty, 
he’s looking at your face. 
when a guy tells you you’re hot, 
he’s looking at your body. 
but when a guy tells you you’re beautiful, 
he’s looking past everything and at your heart.

^lmao

buy a blank notebook. 
draw a huge heart on the cover. 
don’t write anything negative in here. 
if you need another outlet, 
make a separate notebook. 
this one is all about 
love, personal growth, and getting back up. 
fill it with beautiful images, 
reaffirming thoughts, and quotes. 
write in it every day, 
and each day 
write one thing you’re grateful for in your life.

this goes out to all of the people 
who have been broken 
but have been strong enough to let go. 
for the people who have hurt so badly 
that they felt they could never love again, 
but kept their head up. 
for those who feel like going back 
to their old lover would put all the pieces back 
where they belong and everything would fit, 
but accept the cold hard truth instead. 
for the people that learn from their mistakes 
and never stop moving forward, 
even when they take two steps back. 
for the people that wish loneliness 
wasn’t a part of them, 
but put up with it anyhow. 
for the people that are okay 
with taking up all of the room in the bed, 
even if sometimes it feels a little empty. 
for the people who wake up in the morning 
with no missed calls, but smile anyway. 
for the people that periodically miss the past, 
but are so much more excited for the future. 
for the people that have wounds still healing. 
for the people that have so much 
tied to their past relationship, 
but break those chains to start fresh. 
for the people that want to look back so badly, 
but focus on the road ahead. 
for the people that pick up the phone 
so tempted to call, 
but keep their dignity in tact instead. 
for the people that never wanted to let go, 
but had to. 
for the people that still believe in love 
even after all of the hurt their heart has endured. 
for all the people that gave up 
not because they were weak, 
but because most times it’s better just to let go. 
we’ll get our happy ending someday.

you're different now, i could tell right away. 
you don't care anymore. 
you live day to day. 
drugs, sex and alcohol is all that matters to you. 
you had me, but you lost that too.

all i can picture is the color of your eyes, 
and the way you make me smile, 
wow, 
i haven't felt this way in a while.

^<3.

when you're with someone "amazing", 
part of you truly believes 
that you too will be together forever. 
as women, 
we tend to disregard the fact 
that except for in the "crazy talk" of our daily lives, 
and in the dictionary under "F", 
the term "forever" is simply nonexistent. 
so instead, 
love the fact that you're holding hands, 
kissing in the rain, fantasizing 
and making secret plans today. 
because tomorrow, 
forever may be gone. 

^i love jenna marbles<3

we're only as strong 
as the tables we dance on, 
the drinks we mix, 
and the friends we hold onto. 

sometimes i wonder 
how many other girls he is texting 
while he's texting me.

if i reply to your one word texts, 
you must be pretty freakin special.

i wanted to tell you all my secrets,
but you became one instead.

you know why he treats you the way he does ? 
because you throw yourself on the ground 
and act like a rug he can wipe his feet on.

^lmao

i hate when i look horrible in a group picture 
and the person that looks good refuses to delete it.

^awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwh<33333333333 !

i didn’t change, 
i grew up. 
you should try it sometime.

30 day challenge:

day 3 ; a picture of you and your friends.

yeah, i know it says A picture,

but i couldn't find just one, so here's a few (;

jake, casey, clarice, me, eric ; freshman year. homecoming.

alexis donna ; spirit week<3

clarice elizabeth ; bestfriends, 5 years<3

naeesha marie is my baby.<3

halloween 2011 ; faith, jesse, luke, me, bobby

halloween 2011 ; liz, faith, clarice, chelsey, me, alexis.

halloween 2011 ; luke, alexis, me, jesse, bobby, faith.

amanda catherine. bestfriends since 6th grade.

alex danielle. musikfest 2011<3

casey patrick ; he's an ass, but i love him, bestguy friend for 3 years<3

jarilyn. musikfest 2011<3

june 3rd, 2011. 8th grade dance<3

danielle elyssa. my mini me. summer 2011.<3

shamaar, me, christian, amanda. musikfest 2011.

jenna lynn, beach ; summer 2011.<3

leave good feedback babydolls (;